The Saga of Kevin Pillar

Kevin “The Pillar Man” Pillar is the real deal when it comes to hard-boiled baseball players.

After a truly astonishing series of misfortunes, Mr. Pillar still showed up on Tuesday, ready to get back in the lineup! Baseball players are made out of tough stuff.

The saga began Monday night when Mr. Pillar took a direct hit to the face by a 94 mph baseball. That’s some scary ! Obviously the Mets wanted to get him to the hospital as soon as possible, but Mr. Pillar said it wasn’t a big deal and wanted to catch the end of the game. That’s commitment to the job!

Well, the next pitch was a foul ball. It bounced right off his teammates bat, and flew right into the dugout, where Mr. Pillar was giving advice to his teammates. Talk about unlucky! It hit him right in the arm. Oof. And while he was shaking that off, a stray ball from the bullpen sailed in and–you guessed it–hit him in the leg.

After getting hit by a third ball and setting a Guinness World Record, Mr. Pillar agreed to go to the hospital to get checked out. He and the team doctor were parked at a red light outside the baseball field when the next batter hit a home run. The crowd went wild! Mr. Pillar missed most of the commotion though, as the ball sailed out of the park… and directly through the passenger seat window into Mr. Pillar’s head. What are the freaking odds???

The team doctor tried to floor it to get to the hospital asap, but the baseball had lodged itself under the accelerator. What a rude ball!

Assuming the car was kaput, Dr. Mets and Mr. Pillar decided to walk to the hospital. Dr. Met figured that walking would stop his patient from falling asleep. Checks out.

Then as they were waiting to cross the street, a baseball rolled out into the crosswalk. And even after getting burned by so many of its baseball brethren, Mr. Pillar did the heroic thing and dove into traffic to save the little baseball. That’s a true ing hero right there, folks.

Don’t worry about the IV, he can still hold a bat! Double thumbs up!

And then yesterday, Mr. Pillar showed up to the game, all set to play! Just wow.

Best wishes on your recovery, Kevin Pillar! Take it easy!

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