NBA To Ban Controversial Uniform Accessory

In light of the recent suspension of Memphis Grizzly Dillon Brooks for a below the belt hit, the NBA will vote on whether or not to ban a frequently seen uniform accessory.


“The players have been putting these tiny targets on their groins,” reported NBA Commissioner Adam Silver. “We all just thought it was silly, but apparently the opposing players really do aim for the target.”

“We’ve started to see players taping home-made signs to each other’s backs,” Mr. Silver continued, “and that makes it tough for the officials to know who’s who. And even worse, depending on where the sign is, we risk covering up the logo of an important jersey sponsor.”

He asked so nicely! Okay.

“Basketball is funny,” said a little kid. “It’s funny when people get kicked in the wiener.”

They may be making it safer for the players, but is the NBA prepared to lose the under 5 demographic? Stay tuned to find out!

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