You’ve undoubtedly seen the news stories about the prestigious school for learning the hot skills needed to be a professional tight end. But it’s time to brush up on some facts about TEU!
And no, this isn’t some fictional school like Monsters University or the University of Phoenix. This is the real deal!
Tight End University
President: Travis Kelce, Kansas City Chiefs
Provost: George Kittle, San Francisco 49ers
Official Beer: Bud Lite
Uniforms: Levi’s jeans
Minimum GPA, in Core Football: 3.2
Mascot: The Gronk
Required Courses: Film Study 101; Tightness 101; Intermediate Tightness 202; End 101; History of Football aka Lunch, Recess, and Nap Hour; Advanced Film Study and Analytics
Recommended Courses: How to Give a Tight Post-Game Interview to the Press; How to Give a Tight Post-Game Interview to the Press Lab; Weed & You: How to Find Your Chill on the Field, featuring guest lecturer Rob Gronkowski
Q. Can I apply to Tight End U?
A. Only if you’re a NFL tight end and you’re on good terms with University President and Head Lecturer Travis Kelce.
Q. How many classes do you need to graduate?
A. There are six required courses and two option courses, one that includes a lab. You better be prepared to grind because the entire school year only lasts three days. Grab some 5-Hour Energy and a few pots of coffee and get ready to learn some football!
Q. Do you get a diploma?
A. Of course, it’s a real university for football!
Q. Does Tight End U have a football team?
A. Is the Pope Catholic? It’s a college, dude. Yeah, it has a football team. The whole team is really heavy on offense though.
Q. This sounds fake, is Tight End U an accredited school?
A. All these questions. Do you want to apply or not? Yes, it has the official Kelce Seal of Approval. What more do you want? Do you want to be a NFL-caliber tight end or not? Of course you do.
A diploma from Tight End University is a great way to stand out in your next job search! Start networking with Travis Kelce on LinkedIn, and you could find yourself in a TEU lecture hall in the summer of 2023!