Ever since embracing the name The Washington Footballs, the football team from Washington has received thousands of suggestions for a new team name.

Our personal favorites include:

• The Washington Monuments
• The Washington Washingtons
• The Washington Oatmeal
• The Neat Washingtons
• The Washington Athletes
• the washignot poop lmao
• Hey Siri type wash a ton head lice hello hello Siri hello Siri wash cheese
• The Washington Oprahs
• The Washington
• the washington
• The Touchdowns

Those are some great suggestions, folks! But we don’t think you understand how committed this team is to their identities as the Washington Footballs!

Since raising the banner of the Washington Footballs over the land of the home of the brave, the team’s approval rating has skyrocketed! Washington Footballs fans have already spent a total of $6 billion on Washington Footballs jerseys, crockpots, sweatpants, garden gnomes, tweezers, and other cool branded merch. America can’t get enough of the Footballs! And we can’t wait to see what they do next season!