Game Day News Overshadowed by Gronk

Because of Bye Week Hell, fewer football games than usual occurred today. That’s probably for the best, as all Game Day Sunday reporting was dominated by ominous mystery news from former New England Patriot Tight End Rob “The Gronk” Gronkowski.

Gronk has been hinting at delivering some life-changing news. Today he announced that he will reveal his mystery news on Tuesday at 9am (7am for the West Coast!) Start your countdown timers!

Until Tuesday, we can only speculate what Gronk is going to tell us. Here are the top expert predictions.

  • The Gronk is going to make a return to football! And this time, he’s going to be a quarterback.
  • The Gronk is going to make a return to football! And this time, he’s going to join Curt Menefee, Terry Bradshaw, Howie Long, Michael Strahan, and Jimmy Johnson for Fox Sunday! (Well, he’ll be joining four of them… the fifth broadcast team member–identity to be determined–will be banished to a desert island to do Corona commercials.)
  • The Gronk has spent his retirement developing a cure for CTE, and he is ready to share it with the world!
Leaked document! Found in Gronk’s seat at a Boston Starbucks.
  • The Gronk is going to be partnering with Tide to make more funny commercials about laundry!
  • The Gronk no longer wishes to be called The Gronk! He would prefer to be called “The Rob” instead.
  • The Gronk will be starring in a new holiday movie called How the Gronk Stole Christmas! Coming soon to theaters everywhere.
  • The Gronk is buying the New England Patriots! He plans to rename them the New England Big Gronks.

Don’t forget to follow the #CountdownToGronk so you don’t miss his big reveal!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s