Welcome to Week 4 of Football Season! Where has the time gone??

Before you make any rash decisions, check and see if the following players are available on the ol’ waiver wire:

• Patrick Mahomes (QB)
• Odell Beckham, Jr. (WR)
• James Conner (RB)
• Christian McCaffrey (RB)
• Todd Gurley II (RB) — make sure it’s Gurley 2, not his dad
• Davante Adams (WR)
• Julio Jones (WR)

If these gentlemen are free agents, you should get one while you can. If not, there are plenty of savvy pickups for week 4!

Jeremy Sprinkle (TE): Up and coming tight end for the Washington Footballs. His last name is Sprinkle! How fantastic is that? The only thing better would be if his middle name were also Sprinkle. Jeremy Sprinkle “The Big Sprinkle” Sprinkle. Or if he had a brother in the NFL so you could have multiple Sprinkles on your team. Get him in your starting lineup ASAP because for real: only winners get sprinkles. Therefore, we can conclude that you can only be a winner if you have the Sprinkle Man on your team.

Adam Gase (Coach): Major sleeper here. The Jets are churning through quarterbacks at an alarming rate. They hired another QB last Thursday, and five days later–he’s gone already! We could soon be looking at a serious QB shortage for the NFL. With no one on the roster to back up newest QB Luke Falk, in the case of a game day injury, Coach Adam Gase has to be ready to put on his cleats and carry the torch. Good luck, coach!

Ben “Big Ben” Roethlisberger (QB): Okay, look. He’s out. But hasn’t he worked hard to earn a spot on your roster? He puts in 110% on and off the field, and sometimes his boss makes him wear a bumblebee costume as some cruel joke, but you know what–he still shows up and has a good attitude. So if you’ve got some room on your bench, let Big Bean sidle on up to Keke Coutee and Giovani Bernard–and then when your team wins the playoff, all three of those lifelong friends will get Super Playoff Bowl Rings along with the rest of your starters!