Antonio Brown’s Next Move

Shocking, entirely unpredictable news from yesterday–Wide Receiver Antonio Brown was cut by his newest team. Viewers around the world are glued to their televisions and twitter, wondering “What’s next for Antonio Brown?”

Rumor has it Antonio Brown has set a personal goal to be on a different team every week of the 2019 season and wear as many different jerseys as possible. And this future football-fashion icon is off to a solid start.

Antonio Brown, the world’s first football-fashion icon! Here he flaunts his week one and two jerseys! His agent took these photos in front of a green screen and will probably add some cool effects later. We can’t wait to see the final versions!

Week One, Antonio Brown officially sported the striking black and white of the Oakland Raiders! Antonio Brown ended last season as a Pittsburgh Steeler, but was traded to the Oakland Raiders in the off season in exchange for a ceramic dalmatian statue. Interesting move by the Steelers! After his trade, Antonio Brown missed several Raiders practices due to an unavoidable foot injury. But then he couldn’t practice because the NFL didn’t approve of his helmet! AB designed it himself, he thought it was a pure work of art, but Roger Goodell absolutely hated it and wouldn’t let him practice with it. Brown ended up missing so many practices, the Raiders had to cut him because he didn’t know any of their plays.

Brown’s original Raiders helmet designed by AB himself! Spiked, studded with black diamonds to stay true to the Raiders brand style guide, and lined with his salary as padding! Stunning! We’re not sure why Roger Goodell didn’t like this 😦

Week Two, we saw Antonio Brown in fashionable, always-classic navy blue! In a shocking move, he was picked up by the New England Patriots and had a successful week two, in spite of wearing the standard Patriots helmet. But then news broke about Antonio Brown’s long stint as a Bad Guy, and the Patriots noped out of that contract.

So which team is next?? The world is waiting with baited breath to see which tunnel Antonio Brown will run out of tomorrow (or Monday!) and what colors he will be wearing.

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