After what some football experts called a “meh” 2014 season, the defensive coordinator of the Jacksonville Jaguars has decided to base all of his future play calls on the answers from a magic 8 ball. The Magic 8 strategy worked really well for the team during the draft last year when the coach asked it if it was really a good idea to trust the future of the team to a dude named Blake Bortles. Although sources close to the Jagaurs say that they accidentally ordered a Chinese Magic 8 Ball for the draft so the coach couldn’t really tell if it said “yes” “no” or “not on your life” or w/e because he doesn’t speak Chinese. But if u are a Jacksonville fan DON’t WORRY!!! They just spent 60% of the team budget on Magic 8 balls and back-up Magic 8 Balls all in English and they’ve had over a year to perfect their strategy, so expect to see improved play calls this year!
Jacksonville Jaguars to Employ Innovative Play Call Strategy in 2015
So if u r sitting on ur couch watching the game and ur about to jump up n spill your beer and chips all over the floor and start yelling at your tv because the coach called a total bonehead play just stop n think okay do u really know more about the play than the Magic 8 Ball??? Yeah we didn’t think so. It should make for a way less stressful football season!
[…] Jaguars: You have the honor of playing as THE Blake Bortles! And the coach’s magic 8 ball just calls all the plays for you, so that’s one less decision u have to make every […]
[…] a 375% popularity increase! His stats are pretty impressive this season, in part due to Jacksonville’s innovative Magic 8 Ball play calling! Those close to the coaching staff have revealed that the Magic 8 Balls are defective, so they […]