Cards, Fans Shocked by DeAndre Hopkins Drug Test

Arizona Cardinals players, coaches, and fans alike were confused when beloved Cardinal DeAndre Hopkins tested positive for performance enhancing drugs.

Sources close to the Cardinals were quick to throw human resources under the bus for the “careless display” of the 2022 mandatory HR posters.

A leaked image of the Cardinals break room revealed the new mandatory “Medina Spirit Sez” anti-drug poster was partially obscured by the seldom-read OSHA poster.

What are you trying to tell us, Medina Spirit???

“This is bull ,” insisted one anonymous Cardinals employee. “Our friend DeAndre was busy reading about ladder safety, how’s he supposed to know about this drug thing when the poster is covered up?”

“HR should be suspended for six games,” groused another.

For real, though. You gotta use more than one push pin when you’re hanging a poster.

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