Jim Harbaugh and the Michigan are in trouble again! 

The Wolverines were recently in the news for stealing a bunch of signs, and now they’re in trouble for stealing a bunch of recruits who might have gone to other universities to play football!

“I wasn’t planning on playing football at Michigan,” said a player who wished to remain anonymous. ”I was looking at a few colleges, but then I got this letter in the mail on Michigan letterhead from Coach H himself, and he said I should come to Michigan because they have cool spies.”

“How was I supposed to say no to that, spies are so cool,” said another player who received a similar letter. ”Like James Bond and stuff!”

“Oh man, or like Black Widow! From that old movie The Avengers!”

“Spies are so cool. I mean, it was kind of a letdown when it turned out they were just stealing signs or something from other schools. But that’s better than other schools that have no spies as all, you know?”