With a lackluster day of college football in the books, sports journalists have moved on to writing about upcoming professional NFL football games–only to run into a huge dilemma!

“The Chiefs take on the Eagles on Monday night, folks,” shouted an editor. “What’s the angle? Rival brothers, Momma Kelce, or Taylor Swift?”

“We did ‘rival brothers’ for our Super Bowl headlines, people are tired of hearing about it,” said a writer. “Clearly, no matter how great it would be for readership and clicks, Jason and Travis are never going to feud.”

“But if we bring in Momma Kelce,” mused another writer. “Whose side would she take in a hypothetical feud?”

“Are you all morons,” snapped a senior writer. “We write about Swift. That’s what’s selling papers and driving ‘Swiftites’ or whatever to our website. ‘Will Taylor be at the game????’ ‘What will Taylor wear???’ ‘Where did Taylor get her Chiefs jersey???’ That’s all people want to read about. Even the people who hate her will read the article just to complain that we’re writing about her. This is like printing money here, people!”

After an evening of hard work and speculation, the newspaper got 10 new subscribers! Congratulations!